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those who know me know i dont do well with women. sure i have some amazing girlfriends that i love with all my heart and soul. but for everyday purposes? sorry girls, give me the boys club anyday. i will probably get thrown to the dogs for this but, to be completely honest? girlfriends are just too much damn work. a little story for you (all names have been changed to protect the innocent - and the insane): i'm talking to my friend. he is distraught because him and his girlfriend were going out for a nice time and it turned ugly. he (and i have no reason to doubt him) says his girlfriend freaked out at him for NO reason. none at all. i ask all the pertainent questions.. are you SURE you didnt do anything stupid? cuz, you know.. boys are stupid. he assures me he did nothing. so i say fine. im gonna tell you about girls. nothing is easy with girls. nothing. nothing makes sense. nothing. just when you think youve figured girls out, they will slap you in the face with something new. with girls there is always an exception (or 20) to the rule. stop trying to "get" them and just let them "be" them. this is the way girls are built. let me give you an example: eg 1: boy 1 - lets go for a beer.
boy 2 - ok. eg 2: boy: lets go for a beer.
girl: (thinking to herself) why does he want to go for a beer? does he love me? or does he just want to get me drunk and take me to bed. i refuse to let that happen. unless, of course, he buys me dinner too. (outloud) hmmm. im not sure if i should be drinking. maybe we could go get a bite to eat instead?
boy: ok. as long as there is beer. where do you want to go?
girl: (thinking to herself) if we go to cafe 'a' girl 2 will be working. and i think he was with her once. if we go there, he might want her again. but then again, i could rub it in her face that i am with him now. OR we could go to restaurant 'a' and i could get dressed up! (outloud) i dont know. where do you want to go?
boy: wherever. im not really hungry. i will eat anything. i just want a beer.
girl: ok. lets go to cafe 'a'. let me quickly freshen up.
boy: ok. i will have a beer. hurry.
girl: (thinking to herself) what should i wear? jeans. yes. jeans. with my new blue top. but then he will think i am trying to hard. i will wear my sweater. too casual? pause to try on 6 different outfits, hate them all, complain she is fat and put on the clothes she had on in the first place...
boy: ready hun?
girl: oh my GOD! stop rushing me! its not easy being beautiful!
25 mins later...
boy: ready?
girl: (thinking to herself) he didnt say i looked nice. i do look fat. i knew i should have worn the new shirt. i hope girl 2 looks like crap today. she is such a bitch. (outloud) honey, you are so quiet, what are you thinking?
boy: i want a beer.
girl: (outloud) fine. dont tell me. (thinking to herself) he is hoping she is working tonight.
silence...
enter cafe 'a'
girl: (thinking to herself) grrr. she is working tonight. and she looks great. except for her hair, what was she thinking? i think she put on some weight too. i knew i should have worn something else. he cant keep his eyes off her! (outloud) oh SHE is working here now? i didnt know that.
boy: who?
girl: (thinking to herself) WHO? he doesnt even remember sleeping with her? what an asshole.
boy: do you want a beer?
girl: NO! i dont even know why i am here with you in the first place. you cant even remember the girls you have been with. i look fat. you dont love me. take me home. i hate you.
my friend listens (really, he does) and then says "huh" and goes to grab a beer. he comes back and says, "polly? how come you are not a 'girl'? how come its easy with you?" i reply, "cuz i'm an exception to the rule and i just want the damn beer" | 
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